Josh Pikus

robertoluongo:

in grade 8 i did a power point presentation on “whooping cough” and my opening slide was a photo of whoopi goldberg coughing and i was the only person who laughed at it and i couldnt start the presentation for like five minutes because i was laughing too hard at my own joke

(via twodayslaterthatgirltumbled)

selfdoubtandsyphilis:

dankestrnemes:

do animals think in english or in the sounds they make

this is what yahoo paid $1.1 billion for

(via twodayslaterthatgirltumbled)

What I think when kids in my class read

• That’s a PERIOD, NOT A COMMA
• That’s a COMMA, NOT A PERIOD
• Why the hell can’t you pronounce that word?
• THE TEACHER JUST CORRECTED YOU WHY’D YOU GET IT WRONG AGAIN?!?!?!
• Can I sleep?
• If you can’t read, why’d you raise your hand?
• You can’t pronounce THAT word?
• WHAT THE HELL
• The fuck you like long ass paragraphs for
• My skin’s crawling
• Oh god not him, his voice sounds like a dying nail on a dying chalkboard
• You skipped a line
• LOL what was that?
• I don’t even. 

(Source: youcanbethecaptain, via twodayslaterthatgirltumbled)

hungarian:

*takes a nap* who am i

(via twodayslaterthatgirltumbled)

jaclcfrost:

if i call you friend

• we are friend

if you call me friend

• we are friend

if you want to be my friend

• we are friend

friend

• we are friend

(via a-suspicious-looking-person)

foodtrucker:

‘it’s not cold’ said the PE teacher with a coat on

(via a-suspicious-looking-person)